A good article in the Atlantic by Arthur C. Brooks, America Is Pursuing Happiness in All the Wrong Places. It makes good points, but in my opinion does not go deep enough. To truly grow, learn the difference between joy and happiness. Happiness is dependent on externalities, whereas joy is a state of being. Said differently, joy is a conscious choice, a practice if you, for how to see everything. Happiness will not help you love your opponent, but joy will.